6 years ago
Sunday, August 31, 2008
I'm not sure if I have the ability to put into words the loss that I feel with the passing of my Grandma. Betty Jo Davis was the matriarch of the family. Her and my Grandpa were the example of how a couple should be. Their marriage of 61 years is the stuff of legends, now in days. They were described by their pastor as being 1 person almost, "WaltandBetty". The more I think about that the more I believe it is true. They were best friends and could finish each others thoughts without even blinking. I hope and pray that me and Jennifer are like them in every way possible. When I received the call from Melanie on Tuesday morning, I went into a daze and I think that I'm starting to come out of it. I have been beating myself up all week because I was to have my kids call and talk to her and I kept letting it slip my mind. I kept saying we would do it tomorrow, now I will never have the chance. Why the hell didn't I just have them call. Why didn't I call and have my chance to say good bye. I attempted to be the strong one for my Mom and Aunt on the flight to Florida. I think I put on a good front, I know that I will never know for sure. I did a fair job until Wednesday morning when my Grandpa gave me a hug and said that she sure loved you and then the quote "Up Mamaw, pretty outside". I was trying to be strong in front of him and not start crying and until that point I had not really cried. We left the house shortly after that to go to the mortuary to see her remains. Now that was really hard. She had decided that she wished to be cremated long before Tuesday morning came. The mortuary did what they had been asked to do which was making it so those of us that could get there could see her before the cremation. The hard part was since she was not going to be buried she did not have a casket. The viewing was in a cardboard box. My mom and the Aunts did not handle this well. I lost it there and had to sit down. I was wishing my wife was there, she could have helped me hold it together. I know that I'm rambling, sorry. Wednesday we had preparation for the memorial to keep us busy. We also had the expected arrival of Melanie and my Cousin Candy who were driving in and Todd, Kristen and Isiah who were flying. Mel and Candy arrived at 2 AM on the Thursday and we all went to bed to get ready the memorial. The memorial was at 3 PM on Thursday. The memorial just proved how much she was loved and the impact that she had on the people around her. I spent the time looking around the church and seeing the reaction of the people she touched was a powerful sight for me. During the service I looked over at Grandpa and I saw this look of peace on his face and I had to wonder to myself during this how he could be at peace, then I thought back to how much they loved each other and realized that was only part of it. She was, as their minister of 9 plus years said, a child of god and she was in heaven. I'm not overly religious but this day I have to say that I believe. The rest of the time was just reflection with family and comforting Grandpa as much as possible. The women spent time helping by getting Grandma things out of the condo so that Grandpa wouldn't have to. We all know that he is going to want it back someday but today is not the day. We have sat aside things that he will want back over time. Friday seemed to fly by, we went to the beach for breakfast as a family, went to spend time with Grandpa, dinner with family, then a sunset at the beach, packed for the trip back, and then off to bed. Saturday morning, we went and said our goodbyes before getting on the roadback to Indianapolis. The drive back was pretty uneventful. Now the hard part is fact that we have to do the memorial again in a week or so. I love you, Grandma.